Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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