the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Randomize
