She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
