Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
