I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
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