Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Randomize
