I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize