got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
