She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
