Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
