hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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