she was so not down for the gang bang
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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