OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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