She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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