I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
