It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Randomize
