I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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