Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
