ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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