im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
