it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
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