No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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