DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
