i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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