I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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