Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
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