If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
