i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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