I accidentally burped into my bong.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
