You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Randomize
