Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I wish you could order shots online.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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