good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize