what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize