Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
