The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
