Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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