Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize