I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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