it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
