ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
