do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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