i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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