I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
