yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
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