I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
