You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
