I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
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