then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
