I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
