I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
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