I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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